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Gay Tantra Massage ritual

Over the years, Tantra massage has taken many forms. It hails from India, a land of meditation, peace, entrancing scents, essential oils and the sacred erotic. It teaches us to embrace our own naked form, respect our sexual feelings, share tender touches, accept ourselves and our partner and experience a deep, full-body orgasm. Beyond a mere massage, it’s a spiritual process reflecting our inner life and moods. Sometimes it’s like a wild ride on a bucking horse, other times it manifests in waves of ecstasy. Tantra massage will surprise you with its disarming openness and sophisticated playfulness. It is a soft space for experimentation and deep relaxation. That means leaving all your expectations behind, stripping away any fantasies and fully living in the present moment; to feel, to accept, to cry and to exhale. A massage is one of the most pleasant and natural forms of physical contact between people. It can relax you, calm you down and get rid of all the tension and stress of the working week. After a well-done massage, you can feel reborn. Nowadays, our hasty life pace is not very much in favour of quality massages. Most run-of-the-mill massage parlours divide the body up into separate pieces - back, neck, legs and hands; each one with a set price and timespan. Yet our body is a whole and if we are to relax during a massage, we certainly need the time to connect all parts of our body. Equally as important, is your Tantra masseur or masseuse’s attitude. According to Tantra teachings on energy, the emotions of the giver are transferred onto the receiver - so not only feelings, but overall attitudes are shared. The Tantra attitude is based on full acceptance of what mankind really is. Tantra perceives each man or woman as a unique being; a personification of the god Šiva or goddess Šakti. A person is perfect just the way they are. Tantra welcomes everything that happens in the present and does not push it any further. It simply lets things flow. Only then, a space for new experiences opens up. When we feel no need to do anything at all, no push forward, then comes complete acceptance and respect for boundaries - evoked by Tantra massage in its ritual form. It’s in that moment that we can experience something new and different from whatever we have known so far.

What is a tantra massage really about?

There are a number of Tantra massage techniques. Some originate in Tantra only, others have Taoist traditions at their core or try to fuse various elements and customs. The personality, attitude and knowledge of the masseur matters a lot. The Tantra massage I teach and practise myself, connects parts of ancient, Tao Tantra techniques and classical massage. It is a tender and sensual ritual, supporting energy flow and fills the whole body with love and excitement. The loving and healing touches of a masseur or masseuse help you to become more complete and reach a level of loving self-acceptance - of your body and arousal. A part of Tantra massage is also stimulation of the joni or lingam through various touches, from the tenderest to quite dynamic ones. It includes your head and ears, washing rituals with hot towels, using special essential oils, scents and natural oils to the sound of soothing music. Thanks to Tantra massage, human beings can enjoy a full-body orgasm, a deep and fulfilling experience.


Professional Tantra massage is free of lovemaking or any erotic exchange. During a common sexual encounter, we are used to caring about the wellbeing of our partner - which entails actually doing two things at once, meaning you cannot sink deep into your own enjoyment. During Tantra massage, you can fully live in the present moment and stop caring about anything else or sharing. The ideal conduit for deep meditation.

Working with energy

Tantra massage also includes conscious energy work. It teaches us that man has seven main energy centres, called chakras. Those spots correspond to various parts of our life; from the primitive level of sexuality up to the highly spiritual level. During Tantra massage, sexuality connects with the heart and spirituality so that our sexuality is experienced not just in the genitals but with our heart and spirit as well. Only then can we enjoy a feeling of completeness. We use body therapy as well as breathing and intention techniques typically performed by a professional masseur or a masseuse - but some techniques can be learned and practised at home to replicate the experience.

What is the difference between a tantra massage and erotic massage?

The main difference is in the overall enjoyment. Tantra massage includes a real acceptance of sexuality and sacredness. In Tantra, sexuality is the means to self-healing and discovering new life and relationship dimensions. All that happens through touching, talking, acceptance and feeling. An important part of Tantra massage praxis is the spiritual hygiene of the masseur or masseuse. During the massage, there is an energy exchange between a giver and a receiver and the practising masseur or masseuse has to consider how many massages they can actually give per week so that the ritual doesn’t become a business. Tantra massage is primarily a beautiful and sacred act; on a symbolic level it is a service to a god or goddess and that mission has to be preserved all the time. 


Erotic massage works on the level of body and sensuality. There is no spiritual framework of much importance. What matters most are the motives of the masseur and no matter if they enjoy the massage or not, it is just a form of making a living. Which is certainly reflected in the quality of massage and clients’ enjoyment. Another issue being a high number of clients as an erotic massage can easily become just sex work for money. In that case, there is no Tantra at all. The givers are often totally disconnected from their bodies. This kind of mechanism called dissociation allows you to give your body to the customer as if you weren’t actually present in the moment at all. Contrastingly, Tantra really cares for living in the present moment and the integration of all feelings and pleasures.

Tantra massage effects

What you get from Tantra massage is separate from the immediate effect on your body and mind - it’s also an experience of what your sexuality could become. You can transform the experience into your own sexual practice as a principle you can start mutually discovering with your partner. The massage also positively counters issues of premature ejaculation, erectile issues, stress and overall body tension due to overworking. It helps you to connect to your body and become whole again.

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